Circles
It's all about circles, at least that's what it seems to have become. I'm in a place, make a decision to leave that place and change my surroundings, and a few months later, I realize nothing has changed. For, I've been here before, I've seen that tree over there, and those stars they look awfully familiar. Sometimes, the circles frusterate me - sure somethings change everytime I re-visit them, and I get some awesome experiences - but there are days when I just want to get out of the circle and travel in a triangle or something.
I had a soccer game tonight, it was frusterating because I was on a girl that was clearly better then me - and that bugged me. It makes my competitive side come out. I don't like it when people are better then me. I am like a little kid who wants to keep all the good marbles, win all the games of duck-duck-goose, and get all the first picks of the candy. I seem to be happy when I'm on the top - and that's just not cool. I realized that in my job today too - I thrive on being busy, on being a key player, on being important, and when I seem to fade into the background I become restless.
I love being a leader - only to realize I have to be a follower first.
That's a circle - that is one of the circles that I am talking about right now. I have a lot of flaws - anyone who knows me understands what I am saying. I like to analyze those flaws, stress them out, vent about them, but it always seems to stop there. It's like the circle I can't break. Why does it seem like everytime I feel I've made one step forward I only wake up to realize I've fallen back ten steps.
Grrrumpkins I'm frusterated right now - I just want a cold coke:)
posted by Adventures of a Girl @ 10:47 PM
0 Comments:
Post a Comment
<< Home